My Behavior and my words always experiences extra scrutiny, and it is often the case being interpreted in the wrong way. Even my good will, caring words and intention to help could be taken as potential "threats". I started to wonder what the hell had happened in this world? People seem not even have a reasonable judgment to tell the right and wrong. Or is it actually a victimization process that sets me off down the road to that direction?
Being abused for number of years, I feel lucky that I am still alive and healthy both physically and mentally. God gave me the strength to experience and survive the social injustice and psychological violence, and built me into a much stronger woman. But when I saw good people also treated me with prejudice, I feel deeply hurt, and hurt so bad ...
Prejudice often comes from deep misperception and defamation. Victimization follows as a result. The same trip repeats itself in my life over and over again for the past three years, and now in my new company that I've just joined for a couple of months seems to follow the suit.
A very strange phenomenon here I want to point out: people and society as a whole holds a negative attitude, and always trying to find fault to each other in it members. Notice or not, when good things being done, few people even want to mention them, however the majority always look for problems to blame. This world has changed, less and less love remains, but more and more bullying, nit-pickings and even victimization are seen everywhere.
I have been targeted for psychological torture for number of years now. Through my personal experience, I witness some negative aspects of human nature. Without life exposure to this dark side of society, people's vision is quite limited. Now I don't blame people too much for their pettiness and narrow-minded behavior, I will have to let it go calmly. This has become my survivial motto.
A casual conversation during lunch time could be picked on as an incident of "threat nature" made me totally speechless. Caring advice and reaching out to help are perceived as verbal assault nature. I am totally lost in this world.
Saturday, July 19, 2008
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